Water drank: A fucking shit load
I have never in my life peed so much as I did yesterday!! Plus I have been pregnant twice. Holy Pee Batman. So why did I pee so much? Well yesterday I started my total body cleanse. This girl needs to get into shape. I drank tons of water. I skipped my morning cap and let me tell yah I had a headache from Hell. I need my coffee fix. This morning was no cap either. Dangit, maybe I should go make me one. I just drank some more water.
Starting this year and forward I am going to look at food in a completely different way. I will only shop the outside of the grocery store. This means fresh fruit, veggies, meat and the dairy section. The middle is forbidden except for coffee beans, teas, cereal, bread. Maybe I will start shopping at grocery stores that carry bulk grains, that might be better. That way I can bypass the middle almost completely. How nice will that be…I am thinking of the time spend in the store.
I think I am in love with avocados. I have always enjoyed eating them, however I have found a new love in them. They are healthy for you. Omg I mixed some avocados with salmon for a spread for my cracker later on for a snack, or hell I just might eat the whole thing for dinner. Just wish I could get the “real” salmon out here in the midwest. I f-ing hate the frozen shit salmon. Fish should never be frozen people. I love my fish fresh, what can I say…I was spoiled living in Washington. Fresh crab, smelt, shrimp, salmon the list goes on. Now that’s seafood.
Another thing….which I cannot believe I am doing. Wait for it……ok I am going to sign up for a 5K marathon. This girl does not run or jog, I walk. So this will be very interesting to say the least. Super excited for it, however scared shitless at the same time. I cannot jog, wtf am I thinking. How do I train? Do I wake up at the butt crack of dawn before my husband leaves for work and attempt to jog in this fucking cold ass Wisconsin weather? Or do I run up and down my stairs, a lot? I don’t know. I think I will play my Kung-Fu High Impact Kinect game and in between fighting the bad guys, which really is a work out in itself, I will jog in place. Yeah I like that idea. Now that’s a sight in a half.
Wait a mintune….I do not own any tennis shoes. Maybe that will be my first step. Buy some shoes. Oh wait I think I own a pair that I have never worn. See I am not a work out girl. I will find those. Thinking I will need to buy some fancy insoles for them. I am so flat-footed that I walk like a duck with no shoes on. It’s pretty bad. I need support like no other in my shoes, yeah my back is just that bad. I should have a Chiropractor on speed dial.
Insert drinking water here.
Damn you water, I really want a diet Coke. But no that’s not good. So each time I want something bad for me I drink some water. I could really go for some fudge right now. Chug, Chug…drank the rest of my water. Dammit I have to pee!!!!! Time to top of the porcelain God.